Negotiating with Cookies #5 – Furbabies
I’m tossing and turning, struggling to get to sleep, when Fleegle asks, “Where do babies come from?”
I look through the murky darkness in the bedroom at his black silhouette on my bed. “The stork flies them in and delivers them to houses of families who want them.”
“What’s a stork?”
“A bird that’s big enough to carry a baby in it’s beak and still get off the ground. Why are you asking about babies?”
“The neighbors behind us just got one.”
“Uh huh.”
“So if I stop chasing the birds out of the yard, a big one will bring me a baby?”
I worry where this is going. “Yes, that is correct. But why do you want a baby?”
“Not a baby, a baby brother.”
“Hmm. I’m confused,” I say.
He tilts his head. “You? Never.”
“Do you mean one who looks like me or one who looks like you?”
“There’s a difference? I thought you looked like me.”
Next: Negotiating with Cookies #6 – Flies and Opossums
Previous: Negotiating with Cookies #4 – The Garage Sale
Start at the beginning: Negotiating with Cookies #1 – Stinky Butt
Share:
Ceramic Anthropomorphism
If dogs did smoke, I bet they would be terrible chain smokers and leave their butts everywhere.
Share:
Negotiating with Cookies #4 – The Garage Sale
I gather up an armful of tired looking toys and pass Fleegle in the kitchen on my way to the garage.
“Where are you going with all my toys?” Fleegle asks.
“We’re having a garage sale.”
He cocks his head to the side. “You’re going to sell my toys?”
“They’ve been sitting untouched in your toy basket for so long I figured you were bored with them.
He follows me out to the garage, but now he’s carrying something in his mouth and it’s not a toy. “What have you got there?” I ask.
“Your remote to the television,” he slurs around the hard plastic. “It’s your donation to the garage sale. Think of it as going on a diet for the mind and you’re cutting out visual junk food.”
I do a 180 and return the armful of toys to his basket and he drops the remote back on the coffee table. Détente is re-established.
In the kitchen, he grabs his crate by its door and starts dragging it toward the garage.
“What are you up to now?” I ask.
“I’m going to sell my crate at your garage sale.”
Next: Negotiating with Cookies #5 – Furbabies
Previous: Negotiating with Cookies #3 – The Remote
Start at the beginning: Negotiating with Cookies #1 – Stinky Butt
Share:
Negotiating with Cookies #3 – The Remote
“What’s that you got in your crate?” I ask Fleegle, pointing at something small and black inside it.
His tail wags. “Well, Raud, that’s one of your remotes. I think it’s to the television.”
I look at him suspiciously. “What’s it doing in there?”
He sits, his tail now sweeping the floor behind him. “Think of it as me tossing a cookie in there for you.”
“Ha ha, very funny.” I get down on all fours and crawl in to retrieve the remote, still wet with dog slobber, but thankfully not yet chewed on. The crate door bangs against my feet. “What are you doing out there?”
“I’m giving my crate to you and you’re moving in. Now that it’s yours, do you want a stuffed Kong to chew on while I’m out carousing the neighborhood with my friends?”
Next: Negotiating with Cookies #4 – The Garage Sale
Previous:Negotiating with Cookies # 2 – The Crate
Start at the beginning: Negotiating with Cookies #1 – Stinky Butt
Share:
Negotiating with Cookies – The Crate
I hold the crate door open for Fleegle.
He stands his ground and stares at me. “No. I’m not going in my crate.”
“Why not?” I ask.
“Because.”
“Because what?”
“How come it’s my crate? Why isn’t it yours?”
I look at the crate, which is small for me, then back at him. “Well, have you ever seen me get in it?”
“If you get in I’ll get in.”
“I’m sure you would. That would be very cozy.”
“I like cozy.”
“I know you do,” I say and toss a dog cookie in the back of the crate.
“Oh boy, a cookie,” he says as he runs in after it. His tail thumps against the inside of the crate as the cookie crunches inside his mouth.
I put a Kong stuffed with frozen peanut butter in behind him and close the door. He hears the latch close and turns around to face the door.
“Cat butt! I fell for it again, didn’t I?”
“Yes, you did.”
Next: Negotiating with Cookies #3 – The Remote
Start at the beginning: Negotiating with Cookies #1 – Stinky Butt
Gnawing the Bone 